Kink, swinging and dating terms, explained.
Short, plain definitions of the words people search for before they join a community like this one. Each page answers the question first, then covers the differences, the common examples, and the consent rules that go with it.
Kink and BDSM
The practices, the roles, and the words people use for themselves.
Kink
Sexual interests, play or dynamics outside the conventional.
Fetish
Strong arousal tied to a specific object, body part or material.
BDSM
Bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism.
Dom and sub
The two roles in a power exchange: one leads, the other consents to follow.
Switch
Someone who enjoys both sides of a dynamic, depending on the partner and the day.
Shibari
Japanese-style rope bondage, tied for the pattern, the feeling and the connection.
Vanilla
Sex and relationships without kink elements. A preference, not a verdict.
Munch
A casual, no-play meetup for kinky people in a cafe or pub.
Consent and limits
The vocabulary for agreeing on things before they happen.
Swinging and couples
The lifestyle, its roles, and the people couples meet.
Swinger
Someone, usually in a couple, who has consensual sex with other people, often together.
Unicorn
A single person, usually a bi woman, who joins a couple for sex or a relationship.
Hotwife
A partnered woman who has sex with other men with her partner’s full encouragement.
Cuckold
A man whose partner has sex with others while he is kept out of it, by agreement.
Non-monogamy
Relationship shapes where everyone knows and agrees.
Ethical non-monogamyENM
Relationships where everyone involved agrees to more than one partner.
Polyamory
More than one loving relationship at once, with everyone’s knowledge and consent.
Open relationship
A committed couple who agree that one or both may have sex with other people.
Monogamish
Mostly monogamous: a committed couple with a small, agreed amount of openness.
Compersion
Happiness at a partner’s happiness with someone else: the opposite of jealousy.
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On a Coywink profile these words are fields, not labels. Kinks and roles take a stance, from curious to hard limit, and every pick has an audience you choose: members, friends, your partner, or only you. Nothing has to be public to be true.
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